Sometimes when I am reading A Course in Miracles it feels as if the text has gone about ten or twenty steps beyond me. I’m grappling with the book as if was written in Sanskrit. This is one of those sections. And I’m not even sure why because when I take it sentence by sentence, I’m okay. Or I think I’m okay. Then I look up and it’s like: what the hell is going on here?
Yet where I do latch on to this – and pull something from it helpful – is at the end. But before I got into that, let me finish with this idea about challenging reading. The Course is a difficult text. And I think that when we read it with the idea that there is one right way to get it, we’re doomed. For me, when the going gets tough, I try to give myself permission to relax. What’s working for me this time around? What’s the one sentence that leaps out? It’s about trusting that I’m going to get what I need this time and next year – or in ten years – I’ll get something new. That’s hard because I like to feel like the professor (’cause that’s how I spend a fair amount of my time), but it’s not always possible.
It’s good to breathe. It’s good to give ourselves permission to take the little steps – or sometimes just the next obvious step and hell with the rest.
So for me, the fog here lifts a little near the end when Jesus is saying that God wants revelation brought to others (T-4.VII.7:3).
This cannot be done with he actual revelation; its content cannot be expressed, because it is intensely personal to the mind that receives it. It can, however, be returned by that mind to other minds, through the attitudes the knowledge from revelation brings (T-4.VII.7:4-5).
Attitudes. That’s the word that brings me up. Having the experience of revelation – which, remember, is beyond words and deeply personal, inspires some attitude that we can share with other minds. And, we not only can share them – God affirmatively wants us to share them.
So what are those attitudes? Joy maybe? Expectation? Anticipation? Awareness? Faith?
I think it could be all of those. I think it could be a combination, a sort of peacefulness that many Course students experience to one degree or another as the ego is undone and God slips in. And perhaps what it is, too, is that sense of helpfulness (and harmlessness) that are characteristics of miracle workers (T-4.VII.8:2).
There is another wonderful line near the end of this section – wonderful to me, anyway, who so often feels lost and confused and unsure of the next step.
The truly helpful are God’s miracle workers, whom I direct until we are all united in the joy of the Kingdom. I will direct you to wherever you can be truly helpful, and to whoever can follow my guidance through you (T-4.VII.8:7-8).
Why do I like this? Because the implication that we are not alone and not without guidance could not be clearer. So long as we ask for help, help is available and freely and cheerfully given. We do not have to figure this stuff out alone. We do not have to figure out how to bring it into application alone. It’s going to be done through us, once we have figured out that we need to make ourselves available.
Perhaps that is the lesson I want to take from this section: the importance of being a willing miracle worker, and recognizing that it’s okay to say, yes, I’ll do it because the “I” in this case is truly magnificent, truly encompassing and truly not the little “i” stumbling around creation.