It is very hard to have trust – that things will be okay, that things are okay. We are filled with doubt and it is constantly projecting – we won’t be able to pay the mortgage, somebody else is going to get a promotion, our children might die before us. Doubt touches everything external and poisons it and so we live in constant fear. Our internal state is one of fear which breeds even more doubt. It is a vicious circle. But trust would end that. If we could come to trust, we would no longer need to project what is broken and twisted and so we would be at peace.
But how do we do that? That is the question – or it seems to be. We come to A Course in Miracles with a lot of sincerity. We believe that we really do want to be healed. We really do want to accept the light that is in us. We really do want to identify with love and to know ourselves as extensions of God. And somehow it doesn’t work. Things get a little better and they they get worse. One step forward, two steps back, a stumble to the side . . .
Wanting anything is not going to solve the problem. We really have to come to a place where we can see that – that our wanting, no matter how noble, is just another projection. Well, if I only had that then everything would be okay. You see? Want is itself a projection. We say there must be a solution but then we place it outside us – hide it somewhere in the world created by doubt – and then we start seeking. It is like a camera pursuing what it projects. We never arrive.
Can we let that go? The persistent wanting that is so pervasive? Can we bring the fact of ACIM daily lesson 50 into application? Realize it?
I am sustained by the Love of God.
Can we say that and go beyond the utterance – the verbal level – to the meaning behind it? If we believed it – if we lived by that fact – then conflict would end. Wanting would end. We would be free.
There is nothing magical to this. It is just a choice that we make. We can live in doubt or we can live with trust. Nobody can do it for us. Ken Wapnick can’t do it for you. Gary Renard can’t. The know-it-all in your study group, your therapist – none of them can do it. It is a choice that we have to make for ourselves. We have to see the necessity of it and then we have to do it.
Do not put your faith in the worthless. It will not sustain you (W-pI.50.2:4-5).
Nobody is saying this is easy. We have spent lifetimes in conflict, tossed around by the tempest of doubt and fear. It is all we know. Yet if we can just see it – and see the havoc it wreaks on our peace – then we could choose something different. We don’t have to do anything other than change our mind. I am going to try and believe that I am sustained by the love of God today and not by anything else. If we can give the idea some space in the morning and at night – and then return to it frequently during the day – it will yield its benefit. For a while we will experience it as another conflict – doubt then faith then doubt then trust – but eventually we will begin to experience it on another level. It will more and more become a present reality – not another ideal, not another good idea.
We have to choose! If you do not see the importance of that – of taking this step for yourself – then learn why. Who else is going to help you? Who else is going to change your mind? It is something that we have to do – by ourselves and for ourselves. And then simply watch as the world and every brother and sister in it is transformed. But yes – it is very scary at first. Having faith in God when our faith has been in money and food and shelter and all those things that make the body’s survival possible . . . It is a big change we are talking about.
But a natural one. In the end, that is the main thing. You are not here because you are supposed to wallow in fear and misery. You are here to realize the light of God in you and extend it to the entire world.
Let no idle and foolish thoughts enter to disturb the holy mind of the Son of God. Such is the Kingdom of Heaven. Such is the resting place where your Father has placed you forever (W-pI.50.5:3-5).
When we trust God, we are participating in the Atonement. We are making salvation real. what other function would we possibly fulfill?