A Course in Miracles Lesson 58

When we encounter resistance, it’s good to be patient. Resistance is a good teacher. Sometimes I open a lesson – review or otherwise – or read a section of the text, and I don’t understand it. Or it annoys me. I can feel myself obscuring the words, pushing their message as far away as possible. Or I get masochistic. I’m going to figure this out right now no matter what! And an hour later I still don’t know what’s going on, only now I have a headache and I’m late for work or I forgot to eat breakfast.

Resistance is part of our experience of practicing A Course in Miracles and healing our split mind. I felt it this morning, reading this lesson. What is all this abstract metaphysical nonsense? “As I recognize my holiness, so does the holiness of the world shine forth for everyone to see” (W-pI.58.2:5). Or “Seen through understanding eyes, the holiness of the world is all I see, for I can picture only the thoughts I hold about myself” (W-pI.58.1:5).

What do those sentences actually mean? I start to argue with them. I get frustrated with myself for not getting it. People wake up  with A Course in Miracles. Why don’t I perceive the holiness of the world? Why do my eyes insist on confusion and separation rather than understanding?

When this happens, it’s okay to put the book away, make coffee, bake muffins, do a crossword. Eventually we learn that resistance isn’t as scary as it used to be. It’s just another symptom of fear. Of what are we so scared? Why are we unwilling to go into what scares us? Resistance is just unwillingness, which is just another form of fear.

What is there to be saved from except illusions? And what are illusions except false ideas about myself? My holiness undoes them all by asserting the truth about me (W-pI.58.3:3-5).

So get a little space. A few minutes to breathe. I watch chickens scratch the snow. Admire grackles and chickadees in the maple trees. The kids wake up. And then I remember. God is love extending love. Something in me softens. I take my coffee and read the lesson again.

Herein lies my claim to all good and only good. I am blessed as a Child of God. All good things are mine, because God intended them for me. I cannot suffer loss or deprivation or pain because of Who I am (W-pI.58.4:2-5).

And I see it. All those references to our holiness . . . How can we read this lesson – or any of the lessons to which it makes reference – and come away thinking we are lost or hopeless or unlovable. We are perfect creations of a Loving God. When we accept this truth about ourselves, then we are finished with fear, and the world is blessed along with us (W-pI.58.4:4-5). Why see ourselves in any other light than the one in which God gifts both us and the world as one?

I can accept the innocence that is the truth about me. Seen though understanding eyes, the holiness of the world is all I see, for I can picture only the thoughts I hold about myself (W-pI.58.1:4-5).

I want to insist on being broken. I am invested in stumbling. Self-denigration and self-debasement are my mode. It’s a back-handed way of allowing ego’s judgment to go on. I might talk as if I am saved but secretly I do not accept this truth about myself. You maybe. And me someday. But not now.

There is another way.

And that other way is precisely what Lesson 58 insists we learn: right now, right here, without any modification or alteration whatsoever, we are blessed by God. We are God’s holy Children, a Family of perfect light and love, and we can take that knowledge with us everywhere and it will embrace every living thing we encounter.

That is what we resist: the peace, comfort and happiness for which we have been pining for so long. When we sit quietly with our resistance, perhaps we can see this. And seeing it, can offer to let go of our resistance. Give it to Jesus, to the Holy Spirit, to Love. How we describe letting go of resistance is not nearly as important as what happens when we do let it go.

When we let it go, we become willing to be healed, to be one with the One whose desire for us is our desire for the One.

←Lesson 57
Lesson 59→

A Course in Miracles Lesson 57

A Course in Miracles suggests that when it comes the illusion of being bodies in a world we are effectively willing prisoners. Our suffering is a decision we make. And because the power of decision is ours, we can make another.

Nothing holds me in this world. Only my wish to stay keeps me a prisoner. I would give up my insane wishes and walk into the sunlight at last (W-pI.57.1:7-9).

This is easy to say but hard to actually believe. We treat it as a passing concept about our being, rather than the truth of our being. But thinking this way is what keeps us imprisoned. A Course in Miracles does not argue with us – it doesn’t try to convince us. It merely offers us another way to see our situation.

Since the purpose of the world is not the one I ascribed to it, there must be another way of looking at it. I see everything upside down, and my thoughts are the opposite of truth (W-pI.57.3:2-3).

The question is not whether this statement is true or false; the question is whether we want it to be true or false.

You made the problem God has answered. Ask yourself, therefore, but one simple question:

Do I want the problem or do I want the answer?

Decide for the answer and you will have it, for you will see it as it is, and it is yours already (T-11.VIII.4:4-7).

The choice is not ambiguous. It is not unclear. Do we want God’s peace or the ego’s war (W-pI.57.4:3)?

When we choose peace without reservation peace becomes us because it is us. But our choice must be freely made and reflect our genuine willingness to remember what we are in truth. Half-measures are ineffective.

Our decision to side with God, means that we see the world as God sees it, which means that we begin to see “our” peace is also the peace that “abides in the hearts” of all our brothers and sisters (W-pI.57.4:4).

The world I look upon has taken on the light of my forgiveness, and shines forgiveness back at me. In this light I begin to see what my illusions about myself kept hidden. I begin to understand the holiness of all living things, including myself, and their oneness with me (W-pI.57.5:3-6).

Our healed vision – flowing from the mind we share with God – restores us to holiness as it restores all of life to holiness. Nothing is excluded; indeed, it’s inclusion is what makes it – and us – holy.

In this way, A Course in Miracles makes us happy without taking anything away from us. We give up nothing in exchange for everything.

←Lesson 56
Lesson 58→

A Course in Miracles Lesson 56

The egoic perspective is that we are bodies. Bodies are vulnerable. They get sick. They can be assaulted. They feel pain and discomfort. They even die. If in fact we are bodies, then defense measures – ranging from cardiovascular exercise to gun ownership – can make sense.

But if we are not bodies, then the whole attack-defense mechanism is not only in effective (what can be attacked? What can be defended?) but it’s affirmatively problematic because it serves to obscure our actual identity.

A Course in Miracles suggests that this dynamic is not our destiny.

I have tried to give my inheritance away in exchange for the world I see. But God has kept my inheritance safe for me. My own real thoughts will teach me what it is (W-pI.56.1:6-8).

Our “real thoughts” are abstract expressions of love that align with the full creative power of God. We are already thinking them; when we stop giving attention to egoic thinking, our real thoughts rise gently to the surface.

What we are in truth is holiness itself, and the gift of holiness is Vision – seeing not with the body’s eyes but with the mind that is creative because it was created in its Creator’s likeness. The real world reflects not the vulnerability of the body but “the Love of God” (W-pI.56.3:4).

Behind every image I have made, the truth remains unchanged. Behind every veil I have drawn across the face of love, its light remains undimmed. Beyond all my insane wishes is my will, united with the Will of my father (W-pI.56.4:2-4).

This is true because “God is still everywhere and in everything forever” (W-pI.56.4:5). We cannot see apart from God, because God is in our mind – and in all that our mind perceives. The truth of what we are is still held in the Mind of God (W-pI.56.5:4). We are one with God’s thoughts and with God (W-pI.56.5:5).

Our practice restores this fact to our memory, and in doing so leads us to a joy and peace that surpass our understanding.

←Lesson 55
Lesson 57→

Food and A Course in Miracles

A lot of people ask about ACIM and diet – are we encouraged, as students of the course, to eat a certain way? Avoid certain foods? Do we fast at this or that time of year and so forth? Does A Course in Miracles forbid eating meat?

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Garden tomatoes from this past summer . . .

I think those are natural questions amongst seekers in general. Lots of religions have rules and regulations around food. When I was an aspiring Buddhist most of the men and women with whom I sat and studied were vegetarians. It was an extension of compassion – a way of demonstrating kindness to all life. In part because of that model, I was a vegetarian for many years. I have fond memories of those years, particularly  after I met my wife and my cooking really took off. Chrisoula and I had – and still have from time to time – some incredible veggie dishes. Edward Espe Brown’s Zen-inspired cookbooks (especially The Tassajara Bread Book), Deborah Madison’s work, the various texts spiraling out of the Moosewood Collective . . . I still turn to those recipes.

When I was Catholic – especially as a child – we refrained from eating meat on Fridays (a point somewhat lost on the fish we sometimes consumed). As I grew older and more committed to Catholicism I did a fair amount of fasting – avoiding meals, limiting what I ate, and sometimes going for many days with only juice. Nor are Buddhism and Catholicism the only traditions where food is regulated in some ways.

But when we commit to practicing A Course in Miracles, we leave that behind. Well, we leave it behind in the sense that we no longer associate a formal way of eating – of embracing or rejecting a type of food or food preparation – with salvation. The Course has a single goal – to heal the mind that believes it is separated from God. Its references to behavior are scant at best. That is because correcting behavior does not necessarily heal the mind, while healing the mind will always affect behavior – though often in surprising ways.

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Our little orchard was prolific this year . . . these were the blossoms in Spring.

The idea that we can be saved – can end our separation from God, can enter Heaven, et cetera – by changing habits of behavior is an old one. But if it were that easy, we wouldn’t need to have religious and spiritual practices. We’d just adopt certain regulations of behavior, set up some punishment/reward system to reinforce the desired behavior, and police one another. That does not lead to inner peace. In truth, it doesn’t really lead to outer peace either.

What is helpful is making contact with the part of our minds that believes if we can only tweak the external – get the right partner, or the right spiritual practice, or the right diet, or the right prayer – then we will be happy and never struggle again and then remembering that salvation does not work that way. The separation is an inside job – a problem of thought, not circumstance – and so it has to be addressed internally. What is going on outside of us exists as an effect of our thinking, not as a cause. We can learn from it, sure, but the fundamental shift is still going to be at the level of mind.

Thus, you can be a devout meat eater – taking down a meat lover’s pizza every night and a rasher of bacon at breakfast – and be a student of A Course in Miracles. You can also be a vegetarian. Or a vegan. You can be – as Calvin of Calvin and Hobbes once said – a dessertatarian and be a student of the Course. There is no right or wrong way to approach food. As Krishnamurti once said, here paraphrased: eat meat or don’t eat meat but get on with it. In other words, the healing the Course contemplates has nothing to do with our bodies. We can’t eat or fast or exercise or dance or walk our way to inner peace. It’s all in the mind.

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Prize-winning eggs from our flock of layer hens.

That said, it’s important to not be cavalier about the issues that can come up around food. For many of us, it is an area in which we need considerable healing. Forgiveness is always appropriate. If someone is addicted to food in some way, then their practice of the Course is going to involve forgiving – seeing with Jesus or the Holy Spirit – that relationship. And that forgiveness – which, remember, happens in the mind – will probably have some effect on the outside.

Our practice of A Course in Miracles is deeply personal. The course never looks the same from one student to the next. We are called to heal in very specific ways. I know Course students who are very passionate about not eating meat. I respect that. My own practice with food has been to deepen my relationship with it at the level of production – Chrisoula and I (and the kids) grow a tremendous amount of veggies and fruit, raise pigs for meat, chickens for eggs and meat, buy beef from local farmers. We have even kept bees and a goat for milking. I don’t think anybody’s practice of the Course has to mimic that – indeed, it probably shouldn’t. But it is neatly tied into forgiveness for me – a kind of simplicity, a kind of self-reliance, a kind of healthy diet.

The question is always: does it work? It is it helpful? It is important that we not be bullied into thinking that we have to practice a certain way. A Course in Miracles meets us where we are and helps us move from that place ever closer to inner peace and coherence. In that light, what is “right” for someone in an external way is not going to be right for somebody else. It’s okay to find our way.

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Apple harvest! Always one of the great joys of homesteading . . .

Ultimately, the course is about changing our minds, where “change” means “heal.” Sometimes that change shows up in the world. Obviously my home and living arrangements look different than other students who aren’t as devoted to homesteading. Obviously, my relationships are in many ways shaded by my family’s commitment to growing, raising and preserving our own food and nurturing a network of like-minded consumers and farmers. But what really matters is the mind in and through which all of this lovingkindness takes place. I  eat and relate to food in the most loving way that I can. If the goal is love – healing the mind – then whatever follows will be helpful.

To that end, be kind to yourself. Remember the guidance of Lesson 294: the body is “of service for a while and fit to serve, to keep its usefulness while it can serve, and then to be replaced for greater good” (W-pII.294.1:11). Don’t endanger yourself or others in the name of spirituality. Eat well; eat in a way that minimizes guilt; eat in a way that extends love to your brothers and sisters, broadly defined. We gain nothing by depriving ourselves of calories, nutrients, water and the simple joys that attend eating. Wherever we are at with respect to food, our eating – the whole gestalt of it, from growing to preparing to eating to composting – is yet a way to remember that together we are Love.

Note: As this post has been read and commented upon over the years, I have become increasingly sensitive to the importance of respecting the food and eating choices of my brothers and sisters. The course is silent on the subject of what to eat; beyond that, food is like everything else – a means to forgive (that is, to see in a loving and holistic way) the world and all its contents. It is necessary to give attention to life as it arises; it is not necessary to adopt rigorous diets, undergo intense fasts or otherwise attack our bodies.

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A Course in Miracles Lesson 55

Lesson 55 of A Course in Miracles – and the lessons it reviews – is a chance to see again – to experience again – that we do not not know our own best interests because we do not know who or what we are. Our experience, filtered through the ego’s teaching lens, establishes that we suffer alone in a world of chaos. It is this we try to avoid, or try to fix, or try to reimagine.

What I see now are but signs of disease, disaster and death . . . The very fact that I see such things is proof that I do not understand God. Therefore I also do not understand His Son (W-pI.55.1:2-4-5).

The solution to this problem requires no activity on our part. Rather, it is a shift in thought. The only real problem we have is that we think we have a problem (T-26.II.3:3). The abstract solution is to remember that none of this is real because we are not separate from God. The specific solution is to be willing to change the way we think in order to see “the witnesses to the truth” (W-pI.55.1:7).

The world I see is hardly the representation of loving thoughts . . . It is anything but a reflection of the Love of God and the Love of His Son. It is my own attack thoughts that give rise to this picture (W-pI.55.2:2, 4-5).

When we accept responsibility for these thoughts, we simultaneously become able to make contact with our “loving thoughts” which reform the deranged projections of hate and restore to the peace that is God’s intended gift for us (W-pI.55.2:6).

Do you notice ow the narrative voice has changed in the review lessons? In the regular lessons, the narrative Jesus addresses us directly – “you” have this experience, “you” think that, “you” must try to do this in order to heal. But now the text adopts the first person. “I do not know who I am . . . “(W-pI.55.5:2). This is a deliberate shift, and it accomplishes two things.

First, it begins to merge our self with that of Jesus. In A Course in Miracles, Jesus is both teacher and elder brother – a role model for how a separated Child of God follows the Holy Spirit to full acceptance of the Atonement. He is like us and we are like him, different only in our belief in the illusion of separation.

There is nothing about me that you cannot attain. I have nothing that does not come from God. The difference between us now is that I have nothing else. This leaves me in a state which is only potential in you (T-1.II.3:10-13).

So the lessons are helping us accept Atonement, in order to better realize our potential for holiness.

The other thing that happens in the narrative shift is that we begin to learn how ideas in A Course in Miracles can be expressed in many ways, and often the most effective is in language that is personal to us. Several main lessons near the end of the first fifty encourage us to try restating the lesson in the form of related ideas (Lesson 43 and Lesson 46). We are being given license to integrate them more fully into our experience and thus increase their helpfulness.

Why is that helpful? Because the more loving our thoughts become, the easier it is to turn those thoughts toward the Holy Spirit. Indeed, the fact that they are loving is evidence that they are flowing from and to and with the Holy Spirit already. Thus, we are taking the teacher who can translate our experience from fear and hate into the gentle light of Heaven.

It is easy to overlook the benefits of review periods. But these lessons are here for a reason; they are structured the way they are for a reason. When we merely glance at them, we don’t hurt ourselves. We merely fail to use time as constructively as possible. We are postponing salvation.

Is there not a better way? And is it not right before us?

←Lesson 54
Lesson 56→

Be Vigilant Only for God and His Kingdom

So as students of A Course in Miracles we have to make this fundamental decision – we have to choose that we want joy (which is the Kingdom of Heaven) and we have to turn to the teacher who knows how to bring us there. That is what we have to do. This happens naturally when we embrace a serious spiritual path, the one that is ordained for us personally. It’s not about saying no to the other valid paths, or disparaging them, but about saying yes to the one that is laid out for us by God.

When we say yes, we are given help. Jesus becomes available in a tangible way. Lately I imagine him as a long-distance friend – one I don’t see because he lives in another country, but with whom I maintain a deep and thoughtful two-way contact. This personal relationship is critical to my practice and understanding of A Course in Miracles. But, just like friendship necessarily varies from one relationship to the next, your own experience of Jesus will be different.

Jesus points us to the Holy Spirit and urges us to accept “him” as our teacher. This pointing can take the place of prayerful directives, clarity in reading the text, or a combination thereof. The Holy Spirit is symbolic. When we pray to the Holy Spirit we are praying to that part of our mind that a) knows its wholeness in God and b) sees the separation alive in another part of our mind and, by virtue of its capacity to see and know our whole mind, heal it.

We are participants in that healing process. This section and its subsections outlines the essence of how we participate. We reverse our understanding of what it means to give. We teach peace in order to learn it. And finally, we adopt a position of vigilance in favor of God. This is another way of restating another Course adage: what is it for (T-17.VI.2:1-2)? Everything that we experience – images, events, people – are opportunities to choose the Holy Spirit as our teacher. They are chances to wake up to the Kingdom of Heaven. If we are always looking for Heaven – if we are always on the alert for signs of Love and the Joyful Peace that attends God – then we are more likely to see those things.

This is a corollary to projection. We project what we don’t want and thus see it – and attack it – in others. I’m not an insensitive parent, that other person is. But projection – a dubious tool employed by the ego to maintain the illusion of separate bodies and separate experiences – can be used by the Holy Spirit too. That’s what happens when we take him as our teacher. Rather than project fear or guilt, he extends love. So where the ego finds evidence of the separation, the Holy Spirit points out signs of Heaven’s peaceful glory. To have this, we simply have to invite him in.

Well, maybe it’s a bit more complicated. We have to invite him – but of course he is already there, because he is part of us in a real way. He is our right minds. What we really have to do – and what this section calls on us to do – is be vigilant on his behalf. Seek God and you will find him. Knock and the doors will open. There are no maps and no mysteries and no secret handshakes. Those who seek Heaven will remember they are already there.