I am not a body. I am free.
For I am still as God created me.
If we seek the “I Am” – if we seek the experience of knowing God – what are some of the impediments? If it was easy, we wouldn’t need a course or gurus or how-to manuals. In truth, there are many impediments to remembering God (fear of God, anger at God, casualness, ignorance) but most of them share one thing in common: they include, subtly or otherwise, self-condemnation.
My condemnation keeps my vision dark, and through my sightless eyes I cannot see the vision of my glory. Yet today I can behold this glory and be glad (W-pI.218.2-3).
Condemnation takes the form of “I am not worthy.” Or, “why would God bother with me?” Or, “I’ll get to it tomorrow.” Or, “maybe I need to read another book or essay.” Condemnation always postpones joy and peace; it always opts for unhappiness and conflict, however subtly.
People will say the latter two examples in the preceding paragraph don’t reflect condemnation but they do, albeit in nuanced ways. When we love ourselves and want to extend that love to our brothers and sisters, then we don’t postpone it. Who puts off joy and peace except one who wants to suffer? Always it is our attachment to suffering that keeps us mired in separation and the unhappiness and conflict that are its hallmarks.
Likewise, who pretends the answer is outside of him – in another mind, another book, another spiritual path – except someone who is not interested in discovering the truth within their own self now.
Yes, yes. We all have to pass through the phases of self-denigration, putting things off (using time against salvation) and seeking yet another crumb of information, as if the answer were not just given away for free over and over and over, every minute of every day in every mind that is, was or will ever be.
But we have reached a juncture in our ACIM practice where we do not need to play those games any longer. We are not going to hurt ourselves or place obstacles before us. We are not here to condemn ourselves but to remember what is holy in our selves. We are here to remember our innocence, which is shared, and to share it yet again with the world.
When we refuse to harm ourselves – to put ourselves down – we will begin to catch a glimpse of the glory that reflects what we are in truth. We will begin to sense, however dimly, that we are given the answer and all that remains is our willing acceptance. Are we ready to let truth be true? Are we ready to face the radiant light of the one who is God’s Creation and in Whom all Creation lives?
Just how much glory can we stand?
That is the real question, by the way. Most of us at this juncture have had the glimpse. We have a sense of where this all leads. The question now is, how much longer will we wait?
