All Relationship is with God

Relationship begins with seeing that duality is not inherent in life but is rather a mode of perception that one can choose to relinquish. It reflects an internal decision to no longer be regulated by ideas and opinions and beliefs – the clutter of a mind that has dissociated itself from God.

Relationship is what remains when our separation from God is ended, and we perceive only the truth that is eternal and unchanging. When we are of that state, we are resonating with all life, whatever its form, whatever its temporary appearance.

In this sense, relationship and atonement are the same.

We think of our relationships for the most part in terms of something other – a person, an object, a place, a belief system. Could be our spouse, could be A Course in Miracles, could be a diet, could be a landscape. But if the other is subject to change, subject to good and bad, subject to helpful or not helpful, then it is not a relationship but a bargain. We are negotiating in an effort to gain something – a good feeling, a sense of purpose, a moment of pleasure.

It is neither necessary nor helpful (nor possible, really) to arrange the external world to our satisfaction, but it is helpful and possible to arrange it in a way that facilitates our learning and the application of that learning.

But reality is not capable of negotiation. One cannot bargan with the truth. And what is perfect does not make deals.

So the suggestion, then, is that the healed relationship contemplated by A Course in Miracles (T-17.V.h) really has nothing to do with what is external. Rather, it is that which follows in the wake of our internal decision to align our thinking with truth as God created it.

Is it not certain that you will remember a goal unchanged throughout eternity? For you have chosen but the goal of God, from which your true intent was never absent (T-17.V.9:5-6).

Relationship and attention are intimately connected. Moment by moment we give attention to thought – are we thinking with God or against God? This can sound difficult or tedious until we realize that to give attention to thought is to think with God. By giving attention we enter that state of awareness which knows that it is not possible to be separate from God, only to think that it is possible.

In that moment, we are in relationship with love itself as love itself, and the question of “the other” naturally ends.

I think this requires effort at the beginning: I think it is in the nature of learning. One acquires a map and then studies it, and then ventures tentatively out into the territory, checking and rechecking the map. But gradually, one’s knowledge and experience begin to supplant the map. In a sense, they become the map. And so one ventures more readily into the territory, going deeper, taking less with them, and lingering longer and longer.

It is neither necessary nor helpful (nor possible, really) to arrange the external world to our satisfaction, but it is helpful and possible to arrange it in a way that facilitates our learning and the application of that learning.

This is why I wake up early. Our house is small, we work from home, our children our home-schooled, and so things get busy and vibrant quickly. It is more like a fast-paced country diner than a monastery. I love it – I am deeply grateful for it – but I am still learning how to be still in the midst of it.

So those quiet morning hours become the space in which I give attention to truth as God created it, through my practice of A Course in Miracles, and thus nurture my awareness of love which – I know you know this, too – inflects the day with gentleness and peace, ever offering itself to itself.

Transformed Perception is what Transforms the World

A Course in Miracles does not offer a way “out” of the world. There is no way “out.” Rather, the course transforms our mode of perception, sharpening the distinction between what is real and what is false, so that we can choose – moment by moment – to be united with God.

In that divine union, there is no world. There is no subject and object that is the necessary precedent to separation. It is relatively to easy to learn about this: through the course, through its teachers, through other non-dual paths and instructors. But it is another thing to experience it, to make it the fact of one’s life.

This was why Tara Singh insisted that the serious student of A Course in Miracles accept as premise that the time for learning had reached its end.

We must first begin to see that we know nothing other than ideas. We are probably not interested in going any further, nor do we even think that there is anything further. We just say, ‘well, I wish a miracle would happen.’ A person can have ten PhD’s, but what difference would that make. The lesson is still of relative knowledge and the main function of relative knowledge is to keep the separation intact (Nothing Real Can Be Threatened 210).

Taraji understood the wisdom inherent in Thoreau’s observation that “[n]atural ignorance has its place, but educated ignorance is a very dangerous thing.”

Often, it is our yearning for escape – which so frequently translates into mere distraction – that impedes our natural ability to perceive the truth as

God created it.

I have to question – to look at, to inquire into – the problems that I believe shape my life. The people who are not doing what I think they should do, the economy that is not performing the way I want it to, the memories of past injustices and the anticipation of even greater wrongs ahead. A Course in Miracles is clear that “[q]uestioning illusions is the first step in undoing them” (T-3.III.2:6).

This looking or questioning is not in the nature of analysis anymore. There is a place for that but then one can move beyond it to something that is less wordy, less educated. I cannot just read about swimming in the brook, nor watch others swim in the brook. In the end, if I am serious about swimming in the brook, then I am going to have to wade in. In that action, something new happens that  learning can at best only hint at.

This is true of all experience whether we are talking about archery, baking bread, writing poetry or becoming a priest.

To focus on the external as the cause of my peace or lack thereof is nothing more than an evasion of my responsibility to be as God created me. This fact merits close and sustained attention. If it is true that “I am as God created me” (W-pI.162), then what else could possibly matter but coming to that knowledge now? What else could possibly heal the world and bring all conflict to its end?

Holy indeed is he who makes these words his own; arising with them in his  mind, recalling them throughout the day, at night bringing them with him as he goes to sleep. His dreams are happy and his rest secure, his safety certain and his body healed, because he sleeps and wakens with the truth before him always. He will save the world, because he gives the world that he receives each time he practices the words of truth (W-pI.162.3:1-3).

Thus, when I sense that things are amiss in my life, I do not dwell on them but rather give attention to the mode of perception – of thought, of the movement of mind – out of which they arise. This is the real problem, and so there is no solution apart from it. Discover that what is external is without effect and unreal and you discover the will of God within. There is no separation; there is the only idea of it.

In Relationship with Christ through Jesus

While I do not think it is necessary to believe that the historical Jesus dictated A Course in Miracles to Helen Schucman, or to believe that Jesus is an enlightened Son of a Divine Father, or in any other way special or separate from us, I do think that it is helpful to have a personal relationship with Jesus in order to fully enter into the course and give it the internal space to fully unfold its miraculous shifts in thought.

On this journey you have chosen me as you companion instead of the ego. Do not attempt to hold on to both, or you will try to go in different directions and will lose the way (T-8.V.5:8-9).

This is not a matter of faith or belief as we encounter it in the church of formal religion. There is no ritual to it. We are talking about a relationship with Jesus that is in truth a relationship with Christ and we are the Christ.

Christ is God’s Son as He created Him. He is the Self we share, uniting us with one another, and with God as well . . . Christ is the link that keeps you one with God, and guarantees that separation is no more than an illusion of despair, for hope forever will abide in Him (W-pII.6.1:1-2, 2:1).

So when we relate to Jesus in this way, we are reaching the truth of the Self that God created, and that we share with one another as God’s Creation.

What does this mean practically?

It is not an error to talk to Jesus – to relate to Jesus – as if he were a body with whom we are sharing a worldly experience. Though I do not do it as often as I once did, I still offer verbal prayers to Jesus. I still sometimes fall to my knees to say wordy versions of “please” and “help” and “thank you.” This is not spiritually immature. It is not naive or foolish.

Even if we are not ready to enter that space of silence and stillness – that centerless center of inner peace and happiness – we can still sense its presence, and we can sense the welcome it offers all of us, being for all of us.

To adopt Jesus as a model for decision-making in the world can be a very fruitful practice. It can smooth out stressful moments and clear an interior space in which to deepen our understanding and application of right-minded thinking, or forgiveness. For many years I prayed the rosary several times a day, not because I was particularly invested in the so-called promises of such prayers, but because they were calming and quieted the egoic chatter that creates such pressure and confusion.

To relate to Jesus in this sense is to render him very much a symbol. To say that in no way denigrates his fundamental helpfulness. It is not an insult, though obviously many sincere people will perceive it as such. There are helpful symbols and unhelpful symbols in the world of illusion, and turning to those that resonate in peaceful and happy ways is how we heal. This includes Jesus, as it can include everything from walks in the woods to kirtan to biking.

Any of these symbols – and there are countless others – are akin to seams in the veil through which the very light of Christ and Heaven stream, blessing us even in our spiritual exile.

The light becomes ours, and you cannot abide in darkness any more than darkness can abide wherever you go. The remembrance of me is the remembrance of yourself, and of Him Who sent me to you (T-8.IV.2:12-13).

Gradually, we become comfortable in the knowledge that when we turn to “Jesus” we are not turning to a superior being favored of God but rather a symbol of our unity with God. We project our holiness and divinity; relating to Jesus personally is a way of reclaiming that holiness, essentially by extending it to our brothers and sisters. That is always the benefit of loving Jesus: we are made better lovers for the world in its delusions. We heal as we are healed.

We begin to sense, in other words, the oneness with our Creator to which Jesus alludes. We begin to sense the Christ, which is the totality of God’s Creation without limit or specialness. Christ is not Jesus; Christ is all the separated Sons and Daughters remembering their unity with God. That is why I always say that we are in this salvation thing together. I cannot do it without you. You lift and take me with you. There is no other, no better way to say it.

When we consider our relationship with Jesus in this sense, we are talking about something that reflects a deeply personal level of sharing and experience, because it is abstract and internal. But it is increasingly the space into which we settle as our relationship with Jesus itself settles. What is happening externally matters less and less because it is either an expression of our Love for all, or it is an expression of our continual call for Love from all.

In either case, we know that it is never the egoic self that answers, but rather the knowledge of Christ flowing through that self that answers. We aren’t really doing anything outside of being willing. So we relax a little and we don’t take the external world of events and personalities so seriously, because we know it is in better hands than ours, so long as we are attending to the foundational relationship that underlies the all.

That sounds very poetic and mystical, doesn’t it? Well, I am partial to that kind of language so I tend to write that way. But it is important also to see that this connection to Jesus is a very natural and gentle relationship. It is a way of seeing that is not aggressive, that does not rush to conclusion or definition. It is like I know that bluets are called “bluets” or “Quaker ladies” or whatever, but mostly I am just happy to be in the presence of their soft blue and violet petals. The intellect can be a useful tool in its place but it is hardly a necessary precedent to the experience of joy.

Even if we are not ready to enter that space of silence and stillness – that centerless center of inner peace and happiness – we can still sense its presence, and we can sense the welcome it offers all of us, being for all of us. Just knowing that we have a home that is not this world, the way the world understands and defines home, is very healing. There is no expiration date on salvation.

So our relationship with Jesus – which, again, can be very simple and ordinary, and the form of which is a matter of what works for us as individuals in the time and space in which we perceive ourselves – really becomes a reflection of the Holy Relationship, a perfect union of God, Self and shared will, that transforms our perception of all life. It is not the only relationship that does this, as A Course in Miracles is not the only path that facilitates this remembrance, but if it is our path, then it is a good relationship to give attention to in a nurturing way, a loving way, such as we are able in a given moment.

Gratitude is the End of Suffering

Gratefulness ends our suffering and we cannot come to it alone. Gratefulness is always inherent in the extension of love to a brother or sister, which may be experience as either offering or reception. This is why A Course in Miracles so consistently brings us back to the importance of relationship based on our radical equality.

[T]he perfect equality of all God’s Sons cannot be recognized through the dominion of one mind over another. God’s Sons are equal in will, all being the Will of the Father. This is the only lesson I came to teach (T-8.IV.6:7-9).

When I first began to practice A Course in Miracles, I considered miracles to be arrangements of time and space designed to please my desire and ambition. Walking on water and winning the lottery. I wanted what I wanted and the miracle was a divine promise it would be given to me. I was entitled.

It does not work that way, though we can be deceived it does for a long time. Lifetimes perhaps.

What shifts us away from this self-centeredness?

Willingness does. Willingness is critical. When we are willing, we become honest. And when we are honest we can begin to see the futility of our personal plans for salvation. We begin to see that every desire we have can be met and we will still be unsatisfied. We start to understand that there is more to life than the body. It sounds simple but to see it clearly can be very hard. We have been thinking in terms of bodies and the personal self for so long.

When we see the futility of our own action – our own resources – then we reach the space that Bill Thetford reached with Helen Schucman when he said “there must be another way.”

That is the very essence of willingness. What I am doing is not working and so there must be another way. I am determined now to find it.

Tara Singh taught his students that want and reaction could only end when one was determined to end them.

Question these things deeply so that they won’t deceive you anymore. In the end we will have to confront the unwillingness that is in each of us (Dialogues on A Course in Miracles 51).

So we come to that place and self-centeredness ends because we are no longer looking to it for solutions. That part is finished. And what happens then? We begin to notice our brothers and sisters. Again, this sounds so simple, but it so much more lovely and rich than just a sentence. When we see without the egoic filters, we see what is new. We come closer to reality. It is very beautiful and pristine. And it is given to us. It has nothing to do with merit, and everything to do with the generosity of God.

Slowly, I began to perceive in my brothers and sisters their own energies, their own lives. I saw their grief, their love, their light, their fear, their resistance. It was very subtle, like perceiving the faintest of faint rainbows at dusk. I am not perfect at this form of vision yet, because my identification with the Holy Spirit is not perfect, but still. It is a very peaceful experience – simultaneously new and the most familiar thing you can imagine. How kind God is!

And there is nothing to do with it. Nothing to do to it. It is there and you are there within it. You ask what you need to do and you are told and then you do it. It has nothing to do with the ego.

[T]he teacher of God . . . does not make his own decisions; he asks his Teacher for His answer, and it is this he follows as his guide for action (M-9.2:1-2).

So you know, sometimes you are asked to talk with someone, sometimes to hug them, sometimes to just listen, sometimes to let someone else do the talking. And it is okay because you understand that “you” are not the one doing anything anyway. It is being done “through” you; and when another brother or sister does it, “you” are still implicated. You are still being blessed. How could it be otherwise?

When I saw this with clarity, and gave myself to its application, I experienced gratitude at a level I had never known nor imagined possible. I was not getting anything in worldly terms – my old understanding of the purpose of miracles. Rather, I was being blessed with a capacity to extend love to my brothers and sister that far exceeded what the egoic self would even have contemplated.

So that is what A Course in Miracles does. It brings a clarity that allows us to make room for a Teacher who knows, who can really guide us. And because we are at last ready to resign as our own teacher, we can at last give attention to this Teacher. Gratitude – and the end of suffering – is the sure result.

We Are Indulging Ideals or Undoing Illusions

Our practice of A Course in Miracles leads us to that space where there are two choices: either we are indulging the ideal of coming closer to God, which is effectively to worship an idol, or we are undoing the illusions which prevent awareness that we are already in God, as God is in us. The distinction is subtle but important.

Many ACIM students say – certainly I do – that we want to grow closer to God, or move towards Love, or strengthen our interior clarity, or whatever. But all of those are ideals that presuppose time. The assumption is that I am not with God now but through some series of actions I undertake I will be with God soon – tomorrow or next year or in another lifetime.

Whenever I make awakening an ideal, I bring time and effort into the equation. I make a process out of that which is timeless. It is important to see that in doing this I am tacitly confirm my belief that I am presently separate from God.

So what is the alternative to good intentions and promises to get it done tomorrow or next week or next year?

Undoing illusions. Rather than give attention to how sincere and devoted I am – and many of us who are still listening to the ego are sincere and devoted – I can give attention to what right now impedes my awareness of God.

God is given. God is present. Why am I not experiencing the fact of this now? What are the illusions – the internal beliefs and thoughts – that block this awareness?

If I can see those obstructions clearly and without judgment, then they are undone.

There is never anything to do about those blocks – in the sense of having to call someone for advice, or read a book, or take a pill or do some yoga. Those activities are not bad but the solution to any problem is always inherent in the problem. If the problem is that my beliefs obstruct my awareness of God’s presence, then I need to drop my beliefs. That can only be done now. They are a problem now and they can only be solved now.

To give attention to illusions is to meet our responsibility for awakening. It’s not a big deal. It is very straightforward and unremarkable. Right now – literally right now – we can experience God. What is stopping that? We might say that we don’t know, but how do we know that we don’t know?

There is nothing in the present moment that will not bear the gift of our attention and return it. If we are not sure what the impediments are, then we look at our uncertainty. We always look at what is. Soon enough we learn the clear and lovely simplicity that there is nothing else to see. Only this. And it is always here. It is always given.

A Course in Miracles teaches that we have to choose to listen to one of the two voices in us – the ego or the Holy Spirit (T-5.II.3:4) One, the ego, advocates for the efficacy of our own resources and efforts as well as the use of time. This never has worked and it never will work.

The other voice, which is the Holy Spirit, forever brings our attention to the present moment, where our remembrance of God is.

The Holy Spirit is in you in a very literal sense. His is the Voice that calls you back to where you were before and will be again. It is possible even in this world to hear only that Voice and other (T-5.II.3:7-10).

This is what we are doing: we are giving attention to the still small voice inside which surely and quietly removes the internal blocks to awareness of God’s Presence. Focus only on this and all else will be given, because it already is given. There is nothing else to learn, and nothing else to do.

On Projecting Our Inner Teacher

A Course in Miracles teaches – in no insignificant way – that the Holy Spirit is our Teacher (see, for example, T-5.III.10:1, T-7.VII.7:2, T-8.VIII.9:10 and T-16.I.5:6). This is a liberating idea because the Holy Spirit is a symbol of our healed mind, the condition in which it remembers perfectly its oneness with God. Thus, the Holy Spirit is not a separate being external to us who intervenes when asked, but is within us – is us – in a real and practical way.

In order to learn, we have to decide to learn. We have to want to learn. And we are all at different stages of that process. Some of us think we know it all already and some of us aren’t even asking any questions yet. Knowing where we are with respect to learning is a very personal process and it can’t be rushed or overlooked. It is on this basis that we will begin to give serious attention to real learning, real undoing. In a sense, A Course in Miracles aims to bring us to that place, where we can choose the Holy Spirit as our inner teacher.

It can be helpful to adopt an interim teacher in this process – someone (or something perhaps) that will stand in for the Holy Spirit, and help us bridge that space between unwillingness and willingness.

This is in the nature of projection! We are projecting our responsibility to learn onto somebody else and asking them to carry it for a little while. Therapists work very hard with this issue. It is not inherently unhealthy so long as the one upon whom the projection is made is aware of it and is working to undo it.

I think of Tara Singh as my teacher of A Course in Miracles. In doing so, I project onto him my holiness, my sacredness, my responsibility for decision and so forth. This is not an error because Tara Singh did not accept those projections! He knew they were there but he simply looked beyond them to our fundamental equality as creations of God. He was very skillful and attentive in bringing students to a place of decision, but he did not decide for them.

When we discover a teacher who wants only to undo our need for her or him, then we are in the presence of real grace. It is a rare quality!

I also project a great deal onto the bluets this year! I don’t think anybody else is walking around calling bluets their ACIM teacher, though of course I may be mistaken. If you have some of these pretty little flowers available, go sit with them a while. See if you are ready to be their student!

The bluets have intelligence and presence but it falls outside the brain and the world as the ego sees and thinks of it. They are creative and generous and loving but in a radically simple way. When you see their love, it is almost too much to bear. And the thought that you are not separate from them but might express the way they do . . . it brings you to silence. It brings you to stillness.

The bluets can be my teacher because they do not want anything from me! That is the sign of a true teacher – she does not want your money or your praise or your attention or anything. She is just giving of what was given to her, because she knows that the expression of God’s Love is all there is. And so you are blessed by that knowledge, and work through the details in a way that makes sense to where you are at at this particular time and place until you learn there is nothing to learn and never was.

What I am saying is that giving attention to just where we are projecting our inner teacher can be very helpful. Is it working? Are we being led home or directed outward? Is our learning in the nature of a sacrifice or a joyful acceptance of all that is? Learning is a kind of dance that happens away from what is time-bound and matter-bound. Are you hearing that song? Are you feeling that flow?